Please Save Your Judgement For The Mirror

So we’ve implimentented this new do-it-yourself-kid program at our house and even when we aren’t actually at our house. Tonight I had to go to the hardware store to get the correct L brackets to finish the fence project, which is laying in our yard and creating a lovely “Sanford and Son” look.

As soon as we hit the store, Autumn took off. I caught up to her and asked her to stay with me and she melted onto the floor. I asked her to get up and then while holding said brackets in one hand, tried to help her off the floor. When this didn’t work, I found a cart to try and get to the check-out stand but she didn’t want to get in it and I said if she walked with me she didn’t have to. Of course she couldn’t bare to pry herself off the the super-clean concrete floor.

I picked her up against her will and put her in the cart so we could get the hell out of the store as everyone was beginning to stare. As I sat her in the cart, she began to wail and instead of not saying anything like our new program entails, I said; “That is enough Autumn” in my firmest (and cranky) mama voice.” This was by no means a yell or a criminal act but from behind me someone man felt the need to say; “You be nice to her.”

As if! I wanted to turn and finally yell (since that is what I felt like doing anyway) and lay down the long list of ways I’m good to my daughter every day. I was actually trying to be good to her by getting her to cooperate without swinging by the guillotine aisle on my way out. As if I don’t judge myself enough on what I’m doing right and what I’m doing wrong and how far to demand encourage self-reliance from my child and when to give in and just carry her out the door with my yet-to-be-purchased L brackets, many miles from home in the cart and just leave.

I have to get things done and I don’t always want to give in especially since we’re really trying to stay consistant.

Man, you can’t fucking win around these parts!

Can someone be good to me for once please, I’m workin’ hard here!


3 Responses to “Please Save Your Judgement For The Mirror”

  1. what a cruddy comment just at a vulnerable time for you! You are right, as a mom it does seem that we can’t win, no matter what we do.

    I hope you’ve put the comment out of your mind. You’re a great mom and I am so sorry that person stung you like that.

  2. Try to be secure about your parenting. You were doing the best that you could do to manage the situation appropriately. Take comfort in knowing that you love your child, have her best interest at heart and much more often that not, do what is best for her. Forgive yourself if there are times when you allow yourself to over react or come undone, none of us are perfect. Autumn knows that you love and care for her or she wouldn’t push you to your limit.
    It is hard to be opened minded all the time. I almost always allow myself to take the child’s side in those type of situations. Children are vulnerable to adults and you can’t tell when to or not to be concerned. There is so much focus on child abuse these days and sadly enough, to often, feeling sympathy for a child is justified. You know you are a good parent and everyone that matters knows that you are a good parent. The man was just worried about Autumn and let his emotions take over; forgive him.

  3. when has a man ever been able to contribute the right comment at the appropriate time?

    he was probably some single guy who works with children because he “loves them” and “knows how to handle things”

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